“There is nothing like looking, if you want to find something.”
― J.R.R. Tolkien, The Hobbit
So time for a little looking back at what I found during the month just gone.
Wondering why I do that ?? Well this post will fill you a bit. I like this practice of looking back , its simple but it does good work. We rush through life so quick . We forget so easy what’s held our attention and grabbed our hearts. We can forget what’s changed us. This looking back at even the small incidental things slows me down and helps me take notice. Hoping it helps you do the same.
So March it seems for whatever reason had me up to my heart strings in memories of one kind or another. Totally unplanned, they just kept sneaking up on me and not always welcome I might add. Thats the thing about memories – they don’t ask permission, they don’t make an appointment, they just hit you full on and right in the gut sometimes. But lets starts with some good finds
At The Shops
Had a few good thrift shop and other store finds – nothing over $5.00 and most under $2.00 that include vintage glassware (love) an enormous gold tray, some pretty scarves – one as big as a tablecloth which is what I’ve used it for, more gold in some collapsable storage containers, a woven planter and a few pots of greenery which always spend a good couple of weeks decorating my kitchen bench before they find a permanent home.
Any good thrift store finds your way?
I found this box of crafty bits and bobs, coloured letters, stickers, glitter, ribbon you name it left over from my scrapbooking days tucked away in a corner of my bedroom .
Olivia and I had put a bit of a dent in it by the time I took the photo but this is what we did .
Yes it feels kind of silly to be spending time prettying up my diary when theres a trillion other things I could be doing BUT it’s time spent with my girl and she thinks its a perfect way to spend an afternoon. What gave it away? She kept saying “Oh I love this” “I love doing this with you Mum” so I’m thinking its kind of perfect too and – – – – everything else can just wait. In a blink this little girl will be grown and yes we’ll probably be doing other things together but for now that sweet spot involves cutting and sticking and secret telling on a Sunday afternoon.
Good finds house shaped and heart shaped
- @my colourful home Her words are in Dutch but her decorating style definitely speaks my language. Soo pretty and so organised !!
2. And these words from Lisa Jo Baker to celebrate International Womens Day on March 8th. She nailed it as always.
The Memory Keeper
Now my hurtle down memory lane started with this sweet little vintage tin that came to me for safekeeping. It caught my attention straight up because it’s old and dinged up which is just how I like things and because of the pretty picture of Sydney Harbour (pre Opera House it looks like).
It belongs to my mother and she doesn’t recall when or where she got or what it originally had in it (I do like to know these things) but I discovered that like a time capsule its crammed full of our family history. Cards from long ago birthdays , letters written in beautiful old fashioned hand, birth notices, death notices. Joys and heartbreaks all jumbled up together because that’s how joy and heartbreak work. There are fragile newspaper clippings – a few lines about my parents wedding and a front page picture of my paternal grandmother in the 1951 Anzac Day March. I can’t help but wonder what she dreamed of, what did she want for her children, what road did she travel to bring her there that day. I’d like to scroll back or at least enlarge the view.
I’m conscious of the stories and lives contained in this tin, precious souls whose lives and history have bled into mine. I daren’t stay too long or look too hard less it swallow me whole. There’s only the vaguest temptation to organise and catalogue and scrapbook it all into a meaningful whole but they’re not mine to do so. Mostly I want to leave them as they were left. Untampered with, unorganised, pushed in and layered on top of one another as memories tend to be. Kept safe but at a safe distance. Grateful to be able to take a peek, to pay my respect and grateful to put the lid put back on on tight.
Now the second “incident” that occurred was a few Fridays ago watching an interview on ABC s One Plus One with iconic Australian singer John Paul Young. I’ll apologise right now that while the spirit of what Im saying will translate some of the references here might only strike a chord if your are an Aussie and are old enough to remember the seventies music of this guy. Anyone? Now I’ll quickly admit it was all a little before my time but I was alive and with a sister 5 years older than me who never missed an episode of Countdown this music is (as I found out) apparently seared into my brain. I was only half watching until they played his first song Pasadena and then OMG!!!
I was 10 years old again – all adrift and alone, the world a bumpy, hard, uncomfortable place – the memories vague but the emotions real and sharp. Goodness me music can take us places and this place hurt my skin and had me ducking for cover.
I guess some recollections hit our emotions like a tonne of bricks because of whats lost and gone – our youth, our innocence, people, things we dreamed for, time that can’t be gotten back. And there’s that pang of longing for a do over even when we know its not possible, a chance to do things better, to make different choices, to grab back and use every moment and second to its fullest because now we know what we didn’t then – thats its gone in an instant.
But where it leaves me once I’ve pulled myself clear of that freight train is face on the ground grateful. Grateful for redemption and for rescue. Grateful that I made it out alive and with some hope still in tact. Yes sorry for whats lost but grateful for prayers prayed long ago that made a difference in my life. Grateful for fresh mercy daily and the opportunity to rewrite my story and to begin again. It’s easier said then done but that part is mine, what’s lost isn’t.
“There are moments when I wish I could roll back the clock and take all the sadness away, but I have the feeling that if I did, the joy would be gone as well.”
― Nicholas Sparks, A Walk to Remember
I like these words from Emily P Freeman
All we have is this day, this great right now. Let’s look around, let’s be all here if we can, and give ourselves permission to grieve what we need to grieve and to not be afraid.
Now I wont leave you on that melancholy note – heres a find that is totally for fun. With my interest piqued by that interview and my weeping done I did some googling and found this great clip on youtube of John Paul Young in his heyday singing live on Sydney Harbour. Worth a look just to see Sydney Harbour circa 1976 and to see what everyone had on. As I said a bit before my time but another song dogeared in my memory. I showed Olivia and her response: “Oh I love that – I want to keep singing it” The fashions and dance style may change but some music don’t get old. Your welcome.
Now your turn – any finds big or small your way recently? Would love to hear
Wishing you all a happy Easter and I’ll leave you finally with this beautiful quote.
Lv Tracey xx
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